I went to the arena, and greeted the Barn Manager, and my trainer, Poetry, like always, Poetry was working another horse, and after a brief greeting, rode off to the other end of the arena. Well, thinks I, that didn't seem exactly ecstatic to see me, but maybe she's not having the best day, happens, it's not ME, I'm pretty sure.
I went to the other barn, and blanketed up My Little Pony (17 hand Dutch Warmblood Dressage horse) and brought him up. Normal. Except the Barn Manager said "I am SO sorry, you're not riding him today, she is using him for another lesson, and you're to ride another horse, I so forgot she told me that, so sorry, I've got yours for today all ready for you."
She seemed upset, well, ok, I know what it's like to forget to do something your Boss told you to, trust me, so fine, but in my head I went all HELLO? SOMEONE ELSE IS RIDING MY HORSE???? Some OTHER student? Who I can guarantee is NOT working as hard or as serious as ME!????
But Rule #1 is never ever never argue with the coach, in any sport. Ever.
Fine. There are other horses (not nearly as GOOD, mind you) and other people have told me I am welcome to ride their horses if ever Alex is off. Fine.
Then I see my horse for the day.
The PONY? Max the POA Pony?????
I subtly ask the Barn Manager to come over and ask her if she is SURE this is a good plan, he's tiny, and er, does he actually DO dressage? Joan of Dark rode him, sure, but she's tiny, must be 120 soaking wet, and she rides very well, but not dressage.
Barn Manager says, yup, sure is, he needs to be worked, no cantering, walk-trot only.
In my head: Walk-trot??? WTF??? Me??? Working on walk-trot? Do I NEED to work on my walk-trot?????
But you never ever argue with your coach.
I even TWITTER this pic to Joan of Dark, in an attempt to be cheerful about this and make her smile, at any rate.
Here's comparison, so you can see exactly the difference in mounts here. That's Joan on Max, and Me on Alex, a few weeks ago.
I lead him out to the arena, and Poetry says Hey hop up, warm up...And I notice the SADDLE. Tiny. Not small. Not something an adult can ride in. Something a CHILD of five might use.
I break the rule.
"Ah, Poetry, I am not questioning you, but are you SURE my, er, BUTT can fit in the saddle?"
"Yup! You might have to lengthen the stirrups a bit, but hop on!"
OK, then. Right. I start to, and everyone in the barn falls over laughing....
PUNKED!
So forgot what day it was.
Paybacks next year are going to be HELL.
Love and April Fool's Day,
Lorraine
That was a well prepared prank! A lot of love went into the preparation of this.
ReplyDeleteI hope you gave make a behind the ear scritch from me!!!!
ReplyDelete*sigh* Max. MAX gets the ear scritch
ReplyDeleteHee hee hee! Oh Quichie. :D
ReplyDeleteMax looks sad. Like he knows you won't really be working him. Like he knows he'll never be a dressage pony. Poor Max.
Oh, MAN. They got you GOOD. If I think of any excellent revenge plots, I'll send them your way. I'm very good at them, although I usually use my powers for good...*grin*
ReplyDeleteThis gave me a laugh -- and I needed it today. Thanks. :-) ~Ali
I'm not a huge fan of the April's Fools pranks, because so many of them are either stupid or mean, but that? That's really funny.
ReplyDeleteI never pull pranks and possibly this makes me a loser. They must like you if they're prepared to have sooooooo much fun with you, Lorraine. :)
ReplyDeleteThat is Legen...wait for it...DARY!
ReplyDelete:-D
That is awesome!!
ReplyDeleteI completely forgot it was april fool's day and luckily so did ben. He will know once i pick him up from school though so i better watch out!
*giggle*
ReplyDeleteMay Fool is only a month away...
ReplyDeleteI always forget the ticky box...jeez.
ReplyDeleteI'm not speaking to anyone today as I'm gullible best of times.
ReplyDeleteLove the punk tho. I was dying when I saw that postage stamp of a jumping saddle. Good job. Thanks for the laugh. LOL
Fun. :)
ReplyDeleteBack from Maryland. Leaving for Oregon.
Whee.
Such a whirlwind I can't even manage the ticky box!
ReplyDelete*giggle*
ReplyDeleteOh, they got you good!!
Horse peoples are a funny bunch.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA
I told my kids their school blew up during the night. My kindergartener cheered, and my second-grade teacher's pet looked like she was going to cry. When I yelled "April Fool's!" their reactions were reversed.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful prank! I hate the mean ones.
ReplyDelete*snicker And the best bit is how far they were able to take you... I bet Max was amused as well ;o)
ReplyDeleteHappy High Day of Hilarity!!! Let the madness ensue!!!
I hope the rest of the session was just as much fun, but, uhm, mebbe a bit more was accomplished? ;o)
Much love!
Awesome, totally awesome.
ReplyDeleteThat has to be the best April Fool's Day (or is it Fools') prank ever.
The Barn Mgr had been getting my horse, Alex, ready secretly while this was going on, so I had a GREAT ride, lots of leg yielding and half pass work. Much more the thing than walk-trot.
ReplyDeleteGot the Boss home now I am just waiting for the Bus to drop my friend at our exit.
After that: We are SO in my hot tub!
Heheheheh.
ReplyDeleteHeh.
*checks watch* hopefully by now, you've been sufficiently hot-tubbed (can that be a verb?) and are ready for a fantabulous weekend.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you had a great afternoon, overall. Yaaaay! Now, uhm, I can't wait to hear about the potential revenge. April 1 being an annual thing (gotta love the calendar being so reliable, at least through most of 2012 anyway *ahem) you have QUITE a bit of time to prepare.
I worry for them. Oh yes. I do. ;o)
Great work today! Now, I'm off to google leg yielding and half-passing to learn more about this dressage thing. though I think you posted something before about half-passing? Not positive, but will find out eventually ;o)
Have a wondrous evening!
Half pass can always use more work, always.
ReplyDeleteGood Morning!!!!
Tooo early. And there is no coffee here. Out, out into the world, I suspect, and long before we're ready for it.
But there is coffee out there...
i admire that you keep laughing about through screaming muscles, falling off gym equipment, the barn prank, so many things. and well said Nat -clearly a lot of care went into that whole prank!
ReplyDeleteI haven't done a nice elaborate prank like this in years. I know I have done some in the past, but can't think of any right now.
ReplyDelete*tries to stoke conversation*
Well, not sure if it will get the conversation going but I sure did have a great time at the Bout last night!
ReplyDeleteGods, so close, got down to the LAST jam, learned so much and got SO inspired!!!!
And I had a very nice time on the bus with the Sirens, and at the afterparty, and again at the hotel later. They are such lovely girls!
(sorry, afterparties, buses, and hotels are like Vegas, what happens there....)
I will say they were all so happy I was skating now and made me feel very welcome.
That's great!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great night! I love seeing how much fun you're having, and that you're learning such a lot.
ReplyDeleteI am watching Mr Lenny Henry live right now! (Well, not right now.typing would be rude. But it's the interval. ) having a great time, wish you all were here too!
ReplyDeleteIt really sounds like so much. I need to just be able to hang out without doing the whole endangering my body thing. ;-)
ReplyDeleteSo much FUN, it sounds like FUN. Man I am so distracted....
ReplyDeleteLenny Live! Jealous!
ReplyDeleteSore does not BEGIN to describe my quads. Reminds me of the first month in the gym, only multiplied by 100.
Nothing like it, ever. I shall get very strong.
Great practice, made it thru. And learned a lot.
Thinking bed. Oh, gods, bed it up stairs. Ok. Fine. I shall crawl.
Laugh if you like.
Lenny was great! I'm going to blog it as soon as I have time :-)
ReplyDeleteAnd just where are the Fiends hiding???? Tired of hearing me whine about how sore I am???
ReplyDeleteWell, I can walk this morning, and am just normal sore, so I am off to ride soon. Can't neglect my pony.
The snow seems to be melting. TOo early to hope, but it might be spring is coming....
I'm hiding in Oregon. Yesterday involved lots of good food and many hours in Powell's Books. Not too bad a start.
ReplyDeletePowells Books...Ah, I remember it well.
ReplyDeleteI haven't been hiding. I'm at work. (I felt like hiding, once or twice. It's been that kind of day)
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm working. See me work, and not check blogs on the internet at all.
.
.
.
.
.
ooops.
well Happy Monday, peeps.
ReplyDeletei've been not much at the 'puter for a few days. somehow injured a spot in my lower back, i think a sacro-illiac joint. today is the first in several that i can walk semi-normally. ironically, i'd just purchased a new pair of running shoes when this developed. also ironic, i think this injury occurred because i haven't been moving enough.
hope your aching resolves quickly, Lorraine. at least you hurt for good reasons!
the good news here is we have spring!!! we have thaw. still a lot of snow to melt, but it is melting. i can hear that a number of song birds have returned. the days are clearly longer. and stepping outside does not require all possible layers of clothing. *whew*
I am lurking here with (in the words of the great Laurie Pink only a few moments ago) a hormone on me. And a cramp. And there is a big dark cloud hanging over the vicinity. But it's very warm, so I shall not complain about that. The hormone and the cramp, though: BAH.
ReplyDeleteGonna heat a microwavey thing and put it on my angry womb now. TMI? Too bad. RAARGH.
It's supposed to get to be around 80 here today.
ReplyDeleteWe have a lot of stress happening right now. Imminent foreclosure of our old house, that has been on the market for like 7 months now and refuses to sell. My ex (and two of the girls bio-father) is on some serious medication for depression/mood/anxiety stuff and is refusing to stop drinking, so we are stopping his visitation until he can pull his shit together. This has been very trying, as in his normal style he is taking it out on the eldest as being all her fault, since she spoke out about being worried about his condition. I could probably completely break your brain with some of the things he has said and done, just in the last weekend.
*sigh*
On the good front I have been offered/tempted with fast food several times in the last week and held my own! I will continue to lose weight and feel better damn it!
That was a good one!
ReplyDeleteHi Lorraine and Fiends...
ReplyDeleteway back when I was a teen, I wanted nothing more than to be in roller derby...then it all (Derby itself) went away for years.
And I love reading your exploits Quiche, but since my knee surgery, recovery has taken longer and been harder than expected...that just being able to bend my knee or walk w/out limping is quite an accomplishment...I get jealous! I know I need to pace myself, and I know I am getting better but it's frustrating...and then my bloody Dr. makes a quip that at my age, I should just expect things to not work as well! WTF? So I've been really focusing on stretching and bending and my Tai Chi and trying to convince myself of my own progress.
You keep up the awesome work and know I'm reading, just not always commenting...
and jeesh! I may be 50, but I ain't old!!!
Pi, I am so there with you. I still have quite a bit of pain since my knee replacement over 6 months ago. My surgeon and GP both tell me to give it time, "it's still healing".
ReplyDeleteSo I will sit and keep you company as we heal, and do as much as we can while we heal. Walking without limping rocks! My LDR couldn't get over the fact that I don't use a cane anymore when I saw him at the beginning of March, but I still couldn't walk very far.
"Fit", or what I prefer to use "HAES" (Health at Every Size) is both physical and mental, and individual. What it means for Q or others doesn't mean that's what it has to be for anyone else, it's all about what is healthy for each of us.
Oi Toni - words of wisdom!
ReplyDeletePi -my doc said something like that to me not long ago. Perplexed me greatly.
Ceci - the hugest of hugs and much love for you all -not an easy thing for everyone to experience.
I was lurking yesterday, a lot of mother stuff to do and cope with at the moment. *sigh*
Hugs to Cecily...that just plain sucks, especially the adult telling the kid it's her fault!
ReplyDeleteAnd I have an equally amazing April
Fool's story from this year. My daughter is in a relationship with a charming and delightful woman with whom she has been friends for several years, before the relationship deepened. Said sweetie then went off to do volunteer work in Thailand for several months, saying she would be home at the end of April. They've been in close touch the whole time, and my daughter was really looking forward to her return. Daughter's birthday happens to be at the end of March.
Well, on April first, her girlfriend walks into her dorm room! She had planned this from the very start of her trip, knowing she would be back right after Penny's birthday, and never let on that the date she had given for her return was three weeks later, despite many many hours of textng and skype! Pretty amazing.
When I had my knee replaced (the first one), my surgeon said "It will be two years before you are back to 'normal' with your knee activity." He said the same thing after having the other one done, two years later, when the first one was back to normal. Quit trying to rush it. Your knee didn't fall apart in 6 months - it took many years to disintegrate. Give it the time to recover. You weren't trying for climbing Everest this fall, were you? Time heals all things.
ReplyDeleteHeed my words - they are truth.
Dabbler, that is a fabulous story! The best April Fool's joke ever. :-)
ReplyDeleteSo much going on here, my dears! Love to all of you and many hugs. I' so glad again we have US and can come and have a whole group of people who will off love and support.
ReplyDeleteI love coming home to you at the end of the day.
And, yes, Data is right, what works for me, or someone else may not work for you. I'm pretty extreme, there are others who are more so.
It's not about keeping up. It's about doing everything you can and want to. Whatever it is. It's about feeling good and LOVING what you're doing.
If you can go to bed at night thinking "Yeah, I did good things"
You've won. What ever you did.
See how wise I am?
I'm having a post-yoga beer. Is that winning, or is it what I've won? Charlie Sheen would probably know.
ReplyDeleteMy grandmother used to give my mother beer for her cramps, by the way, so I feel fine about self-medicating. It is a Family Remedy.
In other news, I was referred to today as a Twinkly Star. Not exactly living up to that image at the moment, am I?
*BURP*
You're very wise, Q, with a NICE ASS!!!
ReplyDeleteSiri, you're right. I just want to be back to a better normal, if that makes sense. I've made plans to go to the Maryland Sheep & Wool festival in May, and I want to be able to keep up with my friends, but I know they'll deal with whatever I need to do to function, since they're my friends :-)
I did get some bad news yesterday - my aunt, who had been in remission from breast cancer for while, and had been dealing with re-occurances that moved to her brain and her spine, finally passed away Sunday. I'm glad she's out of pain, since she was in a lot of it, but I'm sad that she's gone. Dan and I are headed to be with family for a few days. I think I'm going to hug everybody extra tight, especially my parents.
Way behind on posts. Will try to catch up tomorrow. Had a great day in the mtns w/ my boys. They skiied, I read.
ReplyDeleteMy 17-yr-old nephew told his dad (my sister's hubby, they're 1 yr anniversary is next month) that he liked the way I dressed then promptly added...how old is she? heheh...37 going on 12 ;-)
It is nice to have here to come to and talk with fierce awesome Fiends.
ReplyDeleteThanks for facilitating your Fiend Family.
(((HUGS DataGoddess)))
((((Fiends))))
ReplyDeleteJust dropping in. I've been doing lots of stuff and trying not to drown or let my car drown in the rain. New Orleans has no drainage. However, you all must still come and visit me!
250,950 words. There's a story in there, somewhere.
ReplyDeleteLorraine, I don't think any of us would doubt your wisdom. No maam.
ReplyDeleteSiri - that's a lot of words.
I am cooking muffins, and for some reason it smells like a whole pile of dust burning. I've been scurrying around the house sniffing everywhere to see what is causing the smell. Can't find the source, which is worrying.
Greetings and hugs from France, fiends!
ReplyDeleteI am battling my mom's computer (French computers have their letters in the weirdest places! - which looks like: Frenacl co,puters hqve their letters in the aeirdest plqces1 - just saying)
he - I rather like that Nathalie. Have a good visit.
ReplyDeleteCecily - that sounds tough. I'm glad your kids have you to stand up for them, and I hope things improve soon.
ReplyDeleteDG - ((Toni)) I'm glad you'll be able to spend some time with family, and that your Aunt is out of pain, but it's never easy to deal with, is it?
I can't comment much on the knees, save to say that my grandma had hers done when she was in her 70s - told us all that the surgeon had solemnly explained the only thingthat tshe wasn't allowed to do afterwards was bungee-jumping. She told him, just as solemnly, that she thought she could live with that restriction...!
Enjoy your visit, Nat-Law!
Good Morning!!!!
ReplyDeleteLovely day here. SO far. I have the fire on, but the windows open and the Bengals are all HAPPY.
I'm dressed and ready for action. Which is kind of domestic here this morning. Liking that.
DG and Siri...thanks for supporting comments and DG, I am sorry about your Aunt...I'll be sending some healing vibes to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteCecily. You have some really stressful things going on in your life, I'm glad your daughters have you for support...and we're all here for you!
Siri...congrats on that word count! (That's a lot of words!)
OK Lorraine, what's your action plan for the day??
Well, now, as far as action goes, no morning workout, pre work (where I am now) but I have Derby Practice tonight, which I am REALLY excited for.
ReplyDeleteI think I have my quads at least back to normal sore, and not screaming doom pain, so it ought to be a good one.
I can tell you my EXACT plans for post Derby practice:
Come home.
Feed Bengals.
Hot tub.
Tiger Balm thighs (not as hot as it sounds, trust me)
BED!
Not a bad action plan and tiger balm is the bomb man...*groan*
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, it is amazing stuff!
OK, domestic day. Must do dishes, laundry, etc before I completely lose all surfaces in my house.
Tiger balm works well though.
ReplyDeleteAww I just got COMPLETELY teary eyed and have a HUGE GRIN from Dabbler's story - bestest April Fools EVER!!!! *happy happy sigh*
ReplyDeleteBig love and much healthy/healing energy to those dealing with knee issues. COMPLETELY unfun - but am thinking of you and hope you're taking care of YOU as best you can!
*snughugs!*
AND QUICHE!!! Kick ass at derby tonite! Yes, kicking your own is acceptable ;o) I'll be thinking of you as I'm groaning in the pace line!!!
I've used tiger balm, so I know how it works, and the thought of you rubbing it on your thighs leaves me with two very important words...
ReplyDeleteBe Careful
*squirms*
OMG - late to read this but what a great joke. And a great laugh, thanks.
ReplyDeleteAnd what s cute little pony.
Katie, what a great April Fool's Day joke!
Cecily - so sorry hear what you're going through, but yay on the passing up of fast food!
Na - your poor back!
Q - Derby is whipping your ass into shape and honestly, I thought you were already whipping it into shape!
tick
ReplyDeleteNothing like killing it.
ReplyDeleteGoing to bed now.
Uh, practice. You know, there was that. Yup. Great stuff, practice. Learned Derby Things.....
ReplyDeleteI so gots to go to bed.
Oooh hope you're doin ok! I admit. I lied. I was too bisy trying to keep my screaming thighs under control in the pace line to think of you - but I thought of you on the ride home! ;)
ReplyDeleteI wish you skating improvements and stronger muscles! Rawr!!! And now... I am crawling to bed. Because my legs have declared mutiny. I kinda miss them......
;)
Feeling great this morning! Ok, World, let's GO!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHmm..today seems to be a ride before work, then the Birdchick coming to go over Bee Things, so perhaps a Bee Post tonight, maybe?
What thinks you? Almost Bee Time again, got lots of packages coming..
(Bee Term for "Boxes of Bees")
WAKE UP AND TALK TO ME!
Blogger ate my words.
ReplyDeleteI'm about to go to bed, and it would be wonderful to wake up to a Bee Post.
I shall do my best to oblige!
ReplyDeleteYay for bee posts...and for legs that work, and derby, and, and, and...pretty much anything you want to write!
ReplyDelete(Our bees have made it through the winter, and are out and about, coming home with fuzzy pantaloons of orange, and white, and yellow, and even red.)
:) tick
ReplyDeleteum, i failed at actually checking the box :(
ReplyDeleteVampi, I hate it when that happens. (read as you're not the only one to have done it)
ReplyDeleteOK I'm up now, but no where near early enough to have filled the need for someone to talk to. I go to bed late and I sleep in. Had horrid dreams last night. *shiver*
Buzz. Buzz buzz.
ReplyDeleteThat's all i've got. Haven't had tea yet.
Just came back from a modern art museum and got some labels that reqd "fuck this" "fuck that" "this is fucking urgent" "don't fuck this up" and "fuck yeah" that should go down well with the girlss back at the office. They made me think of Amanda, in particular the last one...
ReplyDeleteHello. I've just spent a frantic morning clearing out closets for renovation. But as it turns out, there won't be a man knocking a hole in my bedroom wall today after all . So, erm, yeah.
ReplyDeleteAnd that is literally ALL. Well, there are other things, I suppose, but they're dull. Last night was the first kickboxing class, but the kickboxing fella couldn't make it, so we did what felt like six hours of flow yoga instead. Not gonna take down any muggers with that.
Blah blah blah blah etc.
I want fuck labels. Which sounds all kinds of wrong. It probably is.
ReplyDeleteReally wrong when one reads that comment quickly and inserts a preposition that doesn't belong!
ReplyDeleteTotally read that as "I want to....."
I don't want those labels, I NEED them. Jess, tis not fair when tradies do that to us - so much effort in getting everything ready for them, and they don't turn up? PHHHHHHT.
ReplyDeleteUh-oh. Shoot. Darn it. Oops.
ReplyDeleteEr, never mind.
Going to work on that new bee post now with all the , er, NEW bee pictures of the Birdchick and I....
New Bee Post is UP!!!!!!
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