The Long Awaited Gun Blog....

As promised: The long awaited Gun Blog! First off, all the pictures are by Kimm Schroeder (AKA SD or Stunt Double) except for those OF Kimm aka SD, which were by Amy Crownhart (AKA Arm & Slam'er or Slamer) (Read it a couple times, it will make sense.)

The second thing about the Gun Blog here, or what I call for short "The Day I Learned To Kill" is that I've been working with someone all week who has a decided preference for old Country Music, and it's, er, rubbed off, so I am writing this listening to my new fav radio station. We'll call it "Twang 100.1" Never written to music like this and I may have things to say, as they come up...

Let's get started. First picture up there: Those are bullets, they come out of the gun. You don't want to BE where they land. They eject shells too, which can go straight down your cleavage. This is less serious, but definitely something new. Don't wave your gun around when this happens, tho.


Here's my first shooting. As you can see: Dude is DEAD. Yeah, I'm that good at this. This was shot with the long Gun which is either a rifle, or a shotgun, I get them mixed up. There weren't any pictures tho where I felt I looked sufficiently BADASS tho, so you'll have to imagine.

(Twang 100.1: I'm sorry you're in prison for something you haven't done. Sucks not to have a good lawyer)


This is the short Gun. There were two kinds. This is the kinder, gentler version. Liked it. Didn't do as well killing my Dude tho. He doesn't have LEGS there on the target we were using, but I sort of mentally drew it in and GUESS what I shot OFF??

(Twang 100.1: Streams don't have Islands. Rivers can. The best a stream can hope for is a sandbar, and even if it DID, you could pretty much just walk OFF if it was a problem.)


Here me loading my own bullets into, hmm, the bullet holder thing. I should mention that this was an adventure clearly led by my Derby Sisters SD and Slam'er, both of whom know exactly what they are doing in regards to guns. It wasn't a "Hey let's learn this together" sort of MISadventure. As a matter of fact, the more I spoke to people about shooting this week, the more it became clear that I may be the ONLY one in this state who does not in fact, own multiple firearms.

(Twang 101.1 If you're sitting all alone in the dark, lonely and crying for Gods sake, turn on some lights, watch some tv, call a friend, go the heck out. Sheesh)


There's Slam'er, who never has any problem looking sufficiently BADASS. (Ever. Actually. With or without guns) She's shooting the other short gun. Thing has a kick to it. And it's really loud. I love the smell of gunpowder in the morning.

(Twang 101.1: I'm really sorry your dog died, but look they DO that. Get another. Sitting in the bar crying about that and crashing your pickup isn't going to HELP)


SD and Slam'er did a lot of explaining to me about the Guns. When you learn these things, you listen. Closely. And if it isn't obvious, if you want to learn these things, learn them with the best friends you have, it's as much about trust as anything else. Trust me.

(Twang 100.1: "you can leave me if you want to, go ahead and go girl, I'll be ok, I'll just sit here with my beer, dont' want to hold you back.." Alcoholic loser. Obviously she left you. Get some damm backbone.)



(Twang 100.1: "Sleeping single in a double bed" Ok. With you there, that does kind of suck, but sleeping double in a double bed isn't all roses either, you need at least Queen sized or it's kind of crowded.


Here's SD. She's so BADASS she can pause shooting, smile for the camera, and get back with hardly a break in the action. This would have been as true had the target been mobile. (this may be my definition of BADASS, having been unable to achieve it any way at all with the long Gun)

(Twang 100.1: "You'd better get your red head back into that bed" Hells YEAH!)



That's me there with the COOL gun. Liked this one. Might even be starting to achieve a sort of "look" Killed me some water bottles with this one, I tell you. My Dude wasn't dying quite as quickly, but no water bottles were walking away.

(Twang 101.1: Little Bity. Little Bity Everything. Rock. May cover this. Fiddles are EVERYWHERE all over the place in country music. This makes it, in many ways cooler than other music. No. You do not get to argue this point.)


Now, you can see them all. The three long ones. The two short ones. The cool one. I loved shooting them and can't wait to again. They're really powerful. They're poetry. Think about it, there's a lot there. They are also the person shooting them. Think about that too.

I feel stronger for it, and more determined. And that's carrying over. I walked away with a very sure feeling that what ever it is:

You can bring it the heck on. Watch me.

Love and Guns, Lorraine aka Quiche MeDeadly

PS (Twang 101.1: Mama tried. But boy oh boy, sure didn't work out for YOU now did it? 21 in prison doing life without parole??? What is UP with you people and lawyers???)