Just Zoe. At The End.
I just saw Zoe, for the first time in about 24 hours, to give her more fluids. The physical change in her was very hard on my heart, and bit pretty deep. But more than that, she's ready to go. Quite simply, she's ready.
Keeping her any longer would be very, very wrong. It is the hardest decision you ever have to make, for a pet, but she trusts us to care for her, has for 14 years now. And she trusts us to help her now. Our vet will come over tomorrow and help her thru the last bit. And Neil and I will be with her.
I, at least, am not going to feel like writing then. So I will tell you things now.
A lot of cats have come thru the house in the last 17 years. Mostly they just show up, at the back door, having followed some sort of Kitty Signs in the woods no doubt, that say "You SO want to go up THERE, these people will feed anything"
But Zoe was pretty special. I remember when she was about 2, she broke her leg very badly falling, and needed about $3000 worth of surgery to save it. Or she could be a three legged cat. For about $400. Neil didn't blink. Do the surgery. This is Zoe, She is special.
(I had at the time a scruffy stray tomcat named Buddy who loved me, and only me, in complete disregard for the fact that he lived in Neil's house and ate his food. I also recall Neil said at the time that if it had been Buddy, we would then have a three legged cat.)
She was like that. Zoe inspired a lot of love in a lot of people. Neil has been getting 100's of e-mails, and people have been stopping by constantly. I've had letters from people I haven't talked to in years, remembering Zoe. She just had so much love going on, and wanted to share it with anyone who crossed her path. (Thank you Nathile and Kyle for the pictures, two more people who loved her deeply)
Even after she went blind, she still saw. And still loved. She had old soul eyes that knew so much. You had to fall in love her. You wanted to take her home. You wanted a bit of that in your life.
I think that is the hardest thing right now, is that I want so much to save her, to do something for her, to keep her a little longer. And we can't. The only thing we can do is the last thing. Tell her we love her and help her on.
She knows this.
Many people have asked if there is anywhere to send something in her name. We would ask, if this is what you want, to send donations in Zoe's name to Great Lakes Bengal Rescue. You can Paypal to firstname.lastname@example.org . All $$ go to saving Bengal cats, who are unwelcome at most shelters.
Zoe wasn't a Bengal. But she had the heart of one. A heart like a Leopard.
Loyal, loving and true.
We, all of us, and you too, will miss her.