I Know What To Do Now. And Know It is Right.
I have been doing a lot of thinking these past couple of weeks. The kind of thinking you need to do sometimes when you have to decide something that is going to effect you for a long time to come. And last night I came, not without regrets, to a decision, and wrote to Janet, head of Great Lakes Bengal Rescue and resigned as a Foster Home.
I don't have the room.
The good news is that The Royals, King Lear the Huge and Little Queen Mab have found a home. A Forever Home.
The more I read the blog I wrote, looking for a home for them, the more I thought: That is me they are looking for.
I have been looking for myself.
And I think I have found it.
It's a little nuts, I admit, but it feels so very right, I can't deny it. Sometimes listening to that voice within is hard, but if you do, it will become REALLY clear.
The Sanctuary exists for Cats of all kinds Wild, who have NO other options. Lear is not aggressive with me, has no Pee issues, and trusts me somewhat. Sending him to Sanctuary would break that trust and send him to live in a place where he WOULD be safe, but never know love of a person, and if they went, would deny two cats who had NO other options a place.
I can't do it. Break that trust and send him away, making him someone else's problem, simply because I don't want two more Bengals and don't want to be bothered? And exactly HOW do I look myself in the mirror after doing that?
Yes, he is an Early Gen Bengal who may never be ok, may never trust completely, and will be a lot of work. But they do HAVE an option, and it might well be I can do a lot for them. Might well be I am meant to.
I think at some point, everyone has to stand up and be counted, and how you will be counted means everything.
If you have to do something because it's the right thing to do, you need to do it, or be counted among the "I can't be bothered."
That's not me.
I can help in so many ways still. The Twitter I did about the Boy in the Michigan Shelter who was going to be put down, resulted in someone driving 4 hours to save him. He got adopted last weekend.
My "Fiver for Hope Plea" resulted in monies to pay vet bills for a dumped kitty and her kittens, all of whom have homes now. I still have over $400 AFTER paying vet bills, ALL of which will go to saving Kitties who cross my path.
My "Any Amount Any cd's" promotion (which is an offer that is still in effect, by the way) where people send monies to GLBR in exchange for my cd's raised huge $$ for GLBR, at a time when they needed it badly. Send something, drop me a note. I send cd's.
I can't Foster any more Bengals, keeping the Royals, but maybe someone will read this, and decide to become a foster home and help. To make up for them losing me. Most Bengals we get are lovely, have no issues and easily find homes.
Maybe someone will see this and want to help too. And send GLBR something, in celebration of King Lear, and his Friend, Queen Mab, finding a home. A token, a dollar. Five. Doesn't matter what amount, just something to say you care too, and want to be counted.
There's a saying"When the Gods close a door, somewhere they open a window." Today, I closed the door between the floors in my house.
And opened the door to the room where the Royals have been living.
Because this is their home.
Love and I have two new Bengals,